Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Alice Walker: Best Boycottin' Hair Nominee



Entry Numero 2 for Best Boycottin' Hair goes to Alice Walker, the author of The Color Purple (which may be the only book to ever be better as a movie - thank you Oprah Winfrey) who refuses to let her seminal work be translated to Hebrew and published in Israel. A writer who hates languages - odd.

Although Alice has since gone to a shortened, natural look (that vaguely reminds me of my Grandmother) her most famous 'do was this LLoyd from Dumb & Dumber bowl cut.




But, oh, I am not done yet. I figure, considering her rebel without a clue style, that these locks were supposed to be dreads. Really? They look like anorexic worms. Yeah, I said it. Anorexic. Worms. In fact, they sort of remind me of Andy Samberg's riff on all the Trustafarians at Liberal Arts colleges. That would make sense considering that it is those sort of institutions where Alice gets paid to sprout her "Israel and America are terrorists" nonsense. Silly Alice, those kind of sentiments are best left for spoiled little rich kids using Mommy and Daddy's money to feign disaffection and seem radical-chic. It is sad when you become a caricature of yourself.

Now, some are going to get mad at me, Dreyfus Amadeus Diallo, for making this about looks but when a once respected author defames herself by making absurd allegations comparing Israel's treatment of its terrorist neighbors to the Ku Klux Klan not only does she make herself silly (as silly as my Best Boycottin' Hair award) but she greatly insults the victims of the KKK, the victims of America's institutionalized racism of the 1960s and the actual apartheid of South Africa. More than enough educated, rational people will take Alice to task with great insight and truth. Me, I am just here to find a winner of the BBH award.

Hate me now.

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